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Sunday, December 29, 2024 at 7:08 AM

Be a light for someone in the darkness of holiday grief

The holiday season, with all its festivities and joy, can also be a deeply painful time for many. For those who have recently experienced the loss of a loved one, the familiar songs, twinkling lights and gatherings of family and friends can serve as bittersweet reminders of what once was.

At Cord of 3, we understand that grief does not operate on a timeline, and for many, the pain of loss is magnified during these celebratory months. As believers, we are called to comfort those who mourn and provide a light in the darkness, reflecting Christ’s love and compassion. The Bible says in Romans 12:15, 'Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep.'

Grief is a natural response to the loss of someone we love, and it manifests in many ways; emotionally, physically and spiritually. The holidays often intensify these feelings because they are filled with memories and traditions that once included our loved one. It is common for those who are grieving to feel a mix of emotions, including sadness, anger, guilt and even moments of joy that are quickly followed by waves of sorrow. Ecclesiastes 3:4 reminds us that there is 'a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance'. Grief is part of the human experience, and it is a journey we must walk through with grace and understanding.

The holiday season offers us a unique opportunity to come alongside those who are hurting and be the hands and feet of Jesus. Isaiah 61:1 tells us of Jesus' mission: 'The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me; because the Lord hath anointed me to preach good tidings unto the meek; he hath sent me to bind up the brokenhearted.' As His followers, we share in this mission. We are called to offer comfort, not with platitudes or quick fixes, but with genuine love and a willingness to listen.

One of the most impactful ways you can support someone who is grieving is simply by being there. You don’t need to have the perfect words or solutions. Sometimes, the ministry of presence—sitting in silence, offering a hug, or holding a hand—speaks volumes. Job’s friends, before they spoke, sat with him in silence for seven days and nights (Job 2:13). They understood that his pain was too great for words and their silent companionship was a comfort.

Often, people shy away from mentioning their loss because they fear bringing up painful memories. However, those who are grieving often feel that their loved one’s absence is overlooked or forgotten. It is healing for them to know that others remember. Say their loved one’s name. Share a story. Proverbs 25:11 reminds us, 'A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver.' Your words can be a soothing balm when spoken in love and sincerity.

Grieving can be exhausting. The everyday tasks of cooking, shopping and decorating for the holidays may feel overwhelming. One way we can show Christ’s love is through acts of service. Consider helping them with holiday preparations, bringing a meal or running errands. Galatians 6:2 encourages us to 'bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.' Your practical help can alleviate some of the pressure they feel and remind them they are not alone.

While it’s important to extend invitations and include those who are grieving in holiday activities, understand that they may not feel ready or comfortable participating. Offer the invitation without expectations, letting them know that their presence is welcome, but there is no obligation. Romans 14:19 tells us, 'Let us therefore follow after the things which make for peace, and things wherewith one may edify another.' Respecting their need for space is an act of kindness.

As Christians, we have a blessed hope that sustains us even in our deepest sorrow. While it is important to allow space for mourning, we can gently remind those who are grieving that we do not sorrow as others who have no hope. First Thessalonians 4:13-14 says, 'But I would not have you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning them which are asleep, that ye sorrow not, even as others which have no hope. For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so them also which sleep in Jesus will God bring with him.'

While grief is a process that takes time, our hope in Christ provides comfort and assurance that this separation is temporary. We have the promise of a glorious reunion for those who are in Christ Jesus.

Finally, we must never underestimate the power of prayer. James 5:16 says, 'The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.' Lift up those who are grieving in prayer, asking the Lord to comfort them, to grant them peace and to wrap them in His love. Pray that they would feel the presence of the Holy Spirit, the 'Comforter' (John 14:26), who heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.

As we enter this holiday season, may we be sensitive to those around us who are struggling with loss. Let us be intentional in offering our love and support, reflecting the compassion of Christ in all that we do. 'Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted' (Matthew 5:4). We have a unique opportunity to be instruments of God’s comfort and to share His light in the darkness of grief. Let us be faithful in this calling, so that His love shines brightly through us, bringing healing to the hurting and hope to the brokenhearted.

If you or someone you know is struggling with grief this season, Cord of 3 Counseling is here to walk alongside you. You do not have to journey through this alone. Reach out to us, and let us offer support and a listening ear as we navigate this season together in His love.


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